Tag: śmieszne (best)

  • Tag: śmieszne
Cherry: What kind of work do you want?
Ataru: I won't ask for much, just ¥10,000 an hour, lots of fun, and something not tiring with lots of pretty girls. The location should be nearby, with meals included, and no overtime. Breaks should last about 2 hours. Afternoon tea is a given, and I can work any hours I like. And as a small request I'd like a paid vacation and family allowance, and housing allowance. And I'd like a bonus!
O Vegecie.
Beerus: His singing and dancing were both terrible. He'd be a fair match for you, Whis.
Piccolo: Five pure-hearted Saiyans? Impossible. Gohan and Goten are the only two like that.
Bulma: How rude of you! Vegeta may be a lost cause, but Trunks certainly has a pure heart!
Piccolo: Someone who has a girlfriend at that age is impure.
Bulma: Whoa! What era do you live in, old man?! Aren't you just being jealous?
Chi-Chi: That's right, Piccolo! Are you saying Goku is impure as well?!
Żółwi Pustelnik: It's true that he's kind, but whether or not a kind idiot who's obsessed with fighting counts as being pure-hearted is debatable.
Tenten: They're revolting...
Lee: Leave them to me. I am the Guykage's right hand man. I can quell this little rebellion. Everyone, please calm down. Let's talk this out..
Tenten: Wow, Lee's actually being serious.
Lee: ...with our fists!
Hikigaya Hachiman: Well, worst case, I get serious. When I get serious, groveling and even boot licking is no problem.
Hikigaya Hachiman: These days, prep schools are granting tuition waivers for students with good grades. If I get that, and get tuition money from my parents, that money will be mine.
Hikigaya Hachiman: Hey! I'm really grown up! I grumble, I tell filthy lies, I do underhanded things...
Motoi: How come your hand is wet?
Killer B: Don't sweat the small stuff.
Motoi: And where's Naruto?
Killer B: I was a pissin' and he went a missin'
Kanji: 人.
Hikigaya Hachiman: Well, they say the kanji for "people" is two people supporting each other. But did you ever notice one side is leaning on the other? I believe the acceptance of sacrificing someone is the whole idea behind "people."
Yoshino: Were you browsing adult sites on Kirino's laptop again?
Kyōsuke: What are you saying, dear mother? Look at this pure blue sky which precisely reflects my heart!
Komatsu: Ah, Sanita!
Sunny: Sanita?!
Komatsu: You know, because you're wearing a Santa suit and you're Sani.
Ane: What's the big deal about getting your butt groped? Do you know why there are two halves to your butt? It's so that you won't mind if someone touches one half.
Kagura: Where's Gin-chan? Is Gin-chan still asleep? Shall I wake him up?
Shinpachi: No, never mind. Gin-san's in kanashibari.
Kagura: Kanashibari? What is kanashibari?
Shinpachi: It's a ghost paralysis. You're awake, but your body can't move. It's a very convenient state for the animators.
Kagura: Convenient?
Shinpachi: Seems all the anime staff are taking a trip to Kinugawa Hot Spa, so they were talking about creating a 30-minute "Gin-san Meets Ghost Paralysis" episode.
Kagura: Kintama!
Shinpachi: Kagura-chan, girls shouldn't say that word.
Kagura: Okay then, how about golden ball?
Shinpachi: That's not good either.
Do Heijiego.
Szef: I always thought there was something uneven between your appearance and working ability! You act like you can easily handle all of your cases! But why are you so useless?
Tōyako: Perhaps an enemy stronger than anything you have ever faced will appear. You can't survive without this ultimate technique. [...] In addition, if this anime is released as a fighting game, it'll be too plain if it doesn't have an ultimate technique. Think about the business aspect. Don't you know how hard a time Bandai's had?
Shinpachi: Gin-san, nurses are really amazing, aren't they?
Gintoki: For example, take a woman who's a 7... Put her in a nurse's uniform and she becomes a 10.
Otae: The most dangerous moment in hunting is the moment you've captured your prey. The bigger the prey, the more you let your guard down. Go read Hunter x Hunter, volume 3, before you try and take us on, old hags.
Sakata Gintoki: I've been reading Jump for twenty years. So I'll teach you about friendship, diligence and victory.
Shinpachi: Uh, Gin? What was that about? How could you screw up the end of the opening sequence?
Gintoki: Don't blame me. There's bound to be a mishap when you do the same thing 23 times in a row.
Kagura: I thought the opening was reused every time.
Olivier Poplin: The entire population of the human race is 40 billion. And half of it is women. Even considering that half of that won't pass the age limit and a further half of that will fail on the account of their looks, there still are 5 billion that are potential targets of my romance. I can't waste even one second.
Murakoshi Miki: You'd prefer a man with lots of money, right?
Miura Chihiro: Wrong. The man of my dreams... He must have a villa, plenty of servants, and a yacht. He must be able to provide me with cute clothes and high-heels!
Satō Yō: Oshiroi, do you want to do it with me... no, with the Hounds?
Oshiroi Hana: Well... I don't know how to put this. It's not that I'm not interested... But... for starters, just one person would be better. I'm new to this, so I'd like to hold hands and stuff first...
Satō Yō: I was asking if you want to join the Hounds.
Oshiroi Hana: But you asked if I wanted to do it in a group...
Takigawa Hōshō: It would seem that the source of the curse was not the spirits of the rokubu, after all.
Shibuya Kazuya: It's Okobu-sama.
Taniyama Mai: How did you know?
Shibuya Kazuya: Because my brain works differently than yours.
Komatsu: Something's there... Z-Zombie-san?
Zonge: It's not Zombie, it's Zonge-sama!
[...]
Komatsu: Good job making it out of there alive. Or are you really a zombie...?
Izumi Konata: I heard that this was something that really happened... Someone who works at a certain video software wholesaler finished work for that day, and got on a bus late at night like he usually does. His house was towards the end of the bus route. And so, as he was riding the bus, other passengers started leaving one by one, and he ended up as the only passenger left. The driver mistakenly thought that there was nobody left on the bus... And, can you believe it? He started to sing, in a loud voice, Danzen! Futari wa _______ Cure!
Konata: Oh, wait, I'm being paged. Hold on. [...] He scolded me for talking too long on the phone.
Kagami: Oh, sorry. I thought your house was rather laid-back with that stuff. But is it actually pretty strict?
Konata: No, we're in the middle of a fighter-game match.
Konata: I went to Asakusa the other day.
Kagami: Oh? When did you go?
Konata: Trains in the winter make you drowsy, you know?
Kagami: She slept past her destination?!
Tsukasa: Wait... But isn't that in the opposite direction?
Konata: Apparently, I slept too long, so it doubled back from the final stop, and I slept past my station again. And when I came to, it was Asakusa.
O malarstwie iluzjonistycznym (trompe-l'œil).
Ōmichi Miyabi: For example, Kisaragi is admiring exhibits in a certain exhibition. The worker seems to be taking down a drawing, but somehow he didn't show any signs of movement. Finding it strange, you go closer to have a look. But, that's not a person, but a drawing on the wall. On closer inspection, the visitors around you are also trompe-l'œil. Coming to your senses, you realize that you're the only person there. Scared, Kisaragi wants to leave the exhibition.
Noda Miki: But, even the exit is a trompe-l'œil!
Switch: Sure wish he'd just talk like a normal person!
Bossun: If everything goes our way, Nwe'll be able to escape! Probably!
Himeko: Y-You're a genius... Probably!
Bossun: Probably!
Himeko: Probably!
Bluenote Stinger: I asked you already. Where is Mavis's grave?
Wendy Marvell: The grave of the founding Master? It has something to do with the second test?
Happy: I see. I understand!
Carla: I'm sure it's something completely Nidiotic, but I suppose I'll ask anyway...
Happy: You want to become an S class wizard, too!
Natsu: Actually, I am hungry. The only thing I ate was the fire from that God Slayer, and then I beat the crap out of him.
Lucy: Well, me too. Cana's heavier than you'd think.
Wendy: Cana's unconscious, but that's still a terrible thing to say...
Sakata Gintoki: Come on, I'm not carrying anything metal. Is it responding to my iron will?
Shimura Shinpachi: I can't! I can't do it! I'd be glad if I can do it with a cute girl like her... But I'm still a boy and this time slot is anime time for children. We were already demoted from golden hour. If the PTA sends in a flood of complaints, the show will be canceled!
Blood Leopard: My name is Blood Leopard. Call me Leopard, not Blood. If you want to shorten it, Pard and not Leopa.
Sanji: This is no time to relax and go whale watching! Even if we've escaped the whirlpool, we're still in plenty of danger here! First of all, did anyone get washed away in the current just now? Let's do a head count! Nami!
Nami: Here.
Sanji: Robin!
Robin: I'm here.
Sanji: Okay, next we've gotta get away from here! If any of those huge whales crash into us, the ship will be smashed!
Chopper: Count us, too!
Usopp: Sanji, the other 6 of us are alive!
Sanji: Nami, orders?
Nami: We're fine where we are.
Sanji: You here that? We're fine where we are, you idiots! Now, let's go whale watching!
Kamogawa: The opponent for your debut match has been selected. Nishikawa Gym's Yusuke Oda!
Takamura: What? Did you say Yusuke Oda?!
Makunouchi: Do you know him, Takamura?!
Takamura: Nope.
Kamogawa: I'd like to tell you the details... but I don't know, either.
Takamura: If you don't know, don't build up the suspense, moron!
Pilaf: Did you just fly over here, young master?!
Trunks: More importantly, I was trying to act cool and I went and said that you're my girlfriend...
Pilaf: Me? Really?
Trunks: Not you!
Shu: Me?!
Trunks: What?! No! The girl!
Mai: Me?!
Issei: Damn it for sucking up energy from girls' boobs!
Kiba: But why the boobs?
Issei: Don't ask something so obvious! I'd love to join in and suck up Akeno's and the President's "energy"!
Asia: Please don't sympathize with the monster.
Issei: Sympathize? Preposterous! I'm completely jealous of the monster!
Shinobi: During the attempt, the Nine Tails devoured Lords Kinkaku and Ginkaku... and then they were expelled.
Shinobi: Expelled? You mean from behind?
Hoshimura Jun'ichirō: Boobs that don't shake aren't boobs at all.
Członek Shinsengumi: That sword is a Kikuichimonji RX-78! It has a built-in digital music player with a maximum playing time of 124 hours!
Azumi: If I don't do something, I'll go crazy. I feel like I'm going to turn into a love monster!
Shinpachi: Well, you already are a monster, I guess.
Mutta: I did two hundred, sixteen squats yesterday, and I feel just fine!
Mother: Two hundred and sixteen?
Father: Such a half-assed number. You couldn't manage four more?
O Nitcie.
Nanba Mutta: First, you see the big guy over there? He's athletic, with plenty of muscle, as you can see. He likes to act cool and play the tough guy. However... His cell phone wallpaper is a cat.
Po zranieniu Videl.
Turtle Sage: Shall I take a look at her?
Son Gohan: Can you help her, Turtle Sage-san?
Turtle Sage: I'll give her CPR!
Gintoki: I don't wanna do any training. It's such a pain.
Shinpachi: He just said something a JUMP main character would never say! He doesn't have a shred of ambition!
Kagura: Might as well skip the effort and reuse footage for the movie itself. Toss in a few new scenes and you'll fool them all.
Shinpachi: That won't work!
Gintoki: Really? Most of Sunrise's movies are recompilations.
Elizabeth: Man, look at you all whining. That's why you're One Piece Quarter. Actually, it took four years to make 1/4 the amount. So if you want to be number one, you'll have to spend sixteen years preparing.
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